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Diary of a fat (?) Black Woman: Get behind me, Satan

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Lordy, Lord, what a week. I tell you, if I didn’t know better, I would think someone is trying to stop me. But it’s not going to work, lol.

Last week was so sad, it was actually funny. First off, I bought some fish from a popular lunch spot – not calling any names – and I was sick for the rest of the week.

That was Tuesday night. I rushed home from work and the bathroom became my bedroom for the night.

For the rest of the week, I woke up with stomach cramps at around 3 am and never made it back to sleep.

I wound up cancelling KK (Killa Kevinia) two days, and the couple of days I did go, I wasn’t good for much.

Then on Wednesday evening I had a serious pain shooting though my heel when I took off my work shoes. I couldn’t put my foot on the ground, and I was hopping all over the place.

KK told me it was a heel spur and I should’ve put my foot on ice. Next time I’ll know.

Thursday morning, I was walking out of the bathroom brushing my hair back with my hand, and I slammed my elbow into the wall. As the pain just shot up my arm, I just knew someone had to be somewhere sticking a pin in a doll that looks like me.

… Now to continue with the food thing, I received the gift of a beautiful, big pumpkin from a friend. Immediately I thought: pumpkin soup, yum.”

I gave the pumpkin to another friend who once told me of her soup skills, so I was licking my lips and swallowing in anticipation of this pot of soup.

Well, well. I got the pot of soup – or should I say broth – on Saturday, nicely sealed in a pot, but when I took the pot from her, it shook, like there was just liquid, no droppas, green fig, nutten tarl.

I was wondering what happened, so I asked and she told me it’s low-fat pumpkin soup.

I said you mean pumpkin broth ’cause last I checked I can’t drink real soup, lol.

To add insult to injury she had a little container with the REAL pumpkin soup. I made such a fuss she offered it to me, but I had to say no because I knew she was just trying to help a sister out.

In her defense, though, the soup – sorry broth – was quite tasty, well seasoned and absolutely delish.

I really couldn’t say much because this is the friend that is looking fabulous, so if she offered me dust to eat, at this point, I would take it.

According to a mutual friend of ours, she’s done just that. Mutual friend made a point of letting me know the other is leaving me in the dust, and she has.

I tell you this, though, I was a bit down, but don’t count me out.

I was back in the gym Monday morning and feeling good.

Feel free to drop me a line with any questions or comments at racchelthomas@yahoo.com.

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